Horse's Ass Award

...goes to You!

You, who condescendingly dismisses my communications, despite your encouragement for me to keep you posted. How the hell do you propose to stay in-the-loop if you refuse to open my messages or take my calls?

Here's a news flash--I don't need your business, if that's the condition underwhich it must be secured. There are plenty of other businesses just like yours, who are easier to reach, less trouble to talk with, and in the long run, more profitable for me to manage than you.

Hope the barn door hits you where you do all your thinking.

Don't Feel Flattered

You're still in my Contacts List.
Not because I will ever call you again.
I won't.
I wouldn't piss on you if you were on fire.

I don't want to take your next whining, wheedling, needy phone call. I want to know it's you before you have a chance to remember what a colossal jerk you've been to me before your thoughtless call.

Because I'm not going to answer.
It's just going to go to voice mail.
And that's just a button-push away from deletedom.

You'll be floating in the ether...a disembodied voice.
An annoyance without a brain (like you've always been).
And then you'll be gone.
Buh-bye.

Meeting Half-way

"Let's meet in the morning," you wrote in a rush.

"Somewhere convenient," I say,

Thinking we'll find an easy place to get into,

someplace about half-way.

I pick a location that's still four-fifths the way there,

more convenient for you to drive;

Oh, no--"come downtown," you write me right back;

--can't believe that you're throwing this jive.

So I'll meet you there--

thirty-miles into town;

(You might want to check on a map

how the distance from my house and your house

to there, ain't even close to being half.)

Don't Give Me Any Static

At some point, I know, this post will see the light of day.

That's okay.

This entire blog is

meant to be therapeutic, but if someone else should happen to see it...oh, well.

The point being, you really have to be careful what you write these days. In fact, you have to be really careful what you Tweet, blog, Pip, e-mail, text, etc. Used to, if you wanted to send a message, you used a carrier pigeon or the Pony Express.

Nowadays, if you as much as think a thought, something's going to transmit it to the entire world in a nanosecond. Yet, we still have to wait an hour to get into a doctor's office we made an appointment to see.

This is way off track.

So a company I do business with is changing its product line, forcing me out of business with them.

That's fair, I suppose, since they're holding all the chips, and I am a mere player at their table.

The aggravating thing about it is that the pot on the table has been shrinking exponentially since the company changed the name of the game, and refused to re-market it.

Customers fell off (surprise!) and revenues have literally been cut in half over the past 10-months.

So now they decide to just clean house, blaming their customers for the loss of market share--never for once acknowledging they're the source of the problem in the first place.

A comment attributed to one of the company's local executives was passed to me today, to the effect that this operation could do as well by offering nothing to its consumers, as keeping the current crop of customers on line.

That's pretty insulting, when it's the company's decision to allow the business to fail through its own attrition.

Yes, these comments are veiled.

If you're reading and you don't understand, you're not supposed to. If you are, and you do, and you're part of the problem, shame on you for your profligacy.

You dim-wit.